Sometimes I wonder what impression I am making on my children and grand-children. Do they see me practicing what I preach? I am not perfect and that leaves me praying that I have done my best. God blessed me, today, through a conversation with my son.
Several of my friends, and family, have lost loved ones this week. I was talking to my oldest son about those who have gone home, these past few days. He is actually my step-son from a previous marriage. He is 36 years old and his dad and I have been divorced for 23...24 years. I bring this up because it is important in regards to what I have to say, otherwise I consider him my own. Anyhow, he brought up how we don't really ever think about certain people until they pass and then all the memories come flooding back. All the good times we have spent with them. I agreed and stated that we should remember those we love before they go on. He whole-heartedly agreed but commented on how hard it is to get past the hurt and old grudges, sometimes. How hard it is to let go of some things...
My answer was this.
"I know but we have to get past them. I've been hurt over and over again, but I know God expects me to forgive, so I do. What begins as hate and anger usually turns into pity for the person who has hurt me, once I forgive them. To go through life, hurting and dragging people through the muck, must be a horrible, miserable, existence. I suppose I have been successful forgiving those who have hurt me because I can't think of one person, I hate... not one."
Here is why it is important for you to know he is my step-son...
He said, "That's why I love you and why I call you Momma."
I answered, with tears in my eyes and a frog in my throat, "And I love being your Momma.".
I guess I am setting a pretty good example for my children and grand-children. I want my legacy to be that I obeyed God, loved my family more than my own breath, and never let hurt or anger dictate my life.
How about you? What kind of impression are you making?